STRATEGIES FOR DEALING WITH AWKWARD SITUATIONS

Break-away conversations: Say: ‘I’m sorry, would you mind rejoining the group as this is really interesting?’

Digressions: Say: ‘That’s interesting, what do the rest of you think about . . . ’ (back to the topic)

Silences: Remain silent. Someone will speak as they will begin to feel uncomfortable. If no one does, ask the question again.

Dominance: First of all stop making eye-contact and look at other people expectantly. If this fails, say: ‘Thank you for your contribution. Can we get some opinions from the rest of you please?’ Or ‘What do the rest of you think about that?’ (This should counteract the one dominant argument by receiving other views on the same issue.)

Leadership: If it is obvious from the start that you have a clear leader who will influence the rest of the group, try to give them another role which takes them away from the discussion, such as handing out refreshments or taking notes. If, however, leadership tendencies aren’t immediately obvious, but manifest themselves during the discussion, try to deal with them as with ‘dominance’, above. If this still fails, as a last resort you might have to be blunt: ‘Can you let others express their opinions as I need to get as wide a variety as possible?’ I’ve actually had to cut short one group and rearrange it when that person wasn’t present. The other members were happy to do this as they were free to express themselves and their opinions were quite different from those of their self-appointed ‘leader’.

Disruption by participants: On rare occasions I have come across individuals whowant to disrupt the discussion as much as possible. They will do this in a number of ways, from laughing to getting up and walking around. I try to overcome these from the start by discussing and reaching an agreement on how participants should behave. Usually I will find that if someone does become disruptive, I can ask them to adhere to what we all agreed at the beginning. Sometimes, the other participants will ask them to behave which often has a greater influence.

Defensiveness: Make sure that nobody has been forced to attend and that they have all come by their own free will. Be empathetic – understand what questions or topics could upset people and make them defensive. Try to avoid these if possible, or leave them until the end of the discussion when people are more relaxed.